Friendor - NOT!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Friendor - Definition: a friend who is a vendor that provides services for your wedding (hopefully free, but at a good cost/value).
I've mentioned our wedding photographer was a "family friend" before and how although I knew it was important to Mr. S to use her, I still wasn't comfortable. I met her for the first time at a consultation in January. One of my biggest questions was about acquiring the rights to our photos, mainly because of all the family not attending, so that we could post on the Internet for their viewing (and of course for my blog sharing). She said she didn't do that and when I and Mr. S pushed a little more she said she could "work with us". Obviously I really only want these for sharing with the family, if I want one for the house, office, etc I'm going to go to her so that the printing is high quality. On top of the not willing to share the photos, we're not getting a good deal (over $3000 for our wedding coverage, an album, the signature portrait, and a "father's pride" thing we're not using). We went for our engagement session last month and then she posted some pictures (about 30) on a website for like 15 days (Remember I tried to post them here? They were so hard to see and did not copy over for saving). We picked one for our signature portrait and then I asked what the cost would be to buy three of them digitally for our wedding announcements. First she offered me her announcements (25 for $45 - seems high compared to other prices I saw). I explained that I wanted the pictures for both the announcements and for web posting, so please send me a price.
Her response:
"The cost for a copyright release is $1000./image. If I can be of service let me know."
Are you kidding me?!? I nearly wrote her back in my angry state, instead I forwarded it to Mr. S and when I got home last night we drafted an email together (of course he kept tight control on the keyboard).
His email:
Thank you for placing the engagement pictures on line for us to view. That was good way for us to make our selection. If possible we would very much like to have a cd with 3 engagement pictures (not previews) and 25 wedding pictures (not previews). We have a lot of family from out of town that are not attending the wedding and we are going to need to be able to post the pictures of our day on our website. We don't feel this is too much to ask, we did some pricing of other wedding packages and it averages 50% of what our cost will be with (her xyz studio)and the rights to the pictures are included.
Everything has been great, pictures have been beautiful, and we are looking forward to the pictures from the wedding day. Unfortunately due to the family being out of town the cd with pictures is going to be a must.
Let me know what we can work out.

Her response to his email:
The images of the wedding will also be posted as the engagement portraits were. Your out of town guest can view them all or we can post a selection for just the guest to view. If they would like to order their own prints they have that option as well. You can post the link to your website so they can visit this site for viewing.
During our consultion we discussed the cd of images and that is not my policy.
Hmmm...so much for "working with us".
Although in my anger I did not email her, I did email my boudoir photographer and asked about her availability. Even though Mr. S wanted to try to work things out, I knew I needed a back up plan and that I needed to do my research if I wanted Mr. S to be persuaded. It looks like she and her assistant are available (not to mention for a 1/3 of the cost) which I'm kind of excited about, I really loved working with her. If something can't be worked out, I also got a business card from a co-worker for her son that does photography. Sounds like I'm covered if we do decide to take a different approach.
So, in the end our friendor did not work out. I'm hoping this doesn't affect Mr.S and his friend's relationship, that's what I'm most worried about. Mr. S wrote the friendor and told her of our decision to go with someone else, I haven't heard anything else. I guess this is a lesson for others when it comes to using friendors in your wedding - sometimes it's worth it to say thanks, but no thanks. I'm sure in the end her story will be that I was "too difficult to work with" or that I'm many other things, but hopefully we handled it with enough tact that his friend doesn't see this as a snub to his mother-in-law, just her business.
How has your friendor experiences worked out?

1 comments:

TheInspiredHousewife said...

Wow - that's crazy! I'm glad you chose to go with someone else. Ridiculous.

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